Don't Dwell On Your Problems, Or Your Problems Will Become Your Dwelling

In this week's episode, I discuss not dwelling on your problems and the issues that result if you do. 

For the sponsor I wish I had, it's all about the Dr….Dr. Scholl's Plantar Fasciitis Pain Refilf Orthotic Insoles:

Affiliate link:

https://amzn.to/4eK2YDp

Just the Tip:

Match your cutting board and knife to the food.

Whisper In
@attractions360

Check out this related video: 
https://youtu.be/QtyASmEZ2F4?si=w_yRSENYi3L5-Ljw 

Check out the Story. Lesson. Advice. Podcast here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/919333/14216914 

Have a topic suggestion for the show? Email me at saturdayisdadurday@gmail.com 

Music by Purple-planet.com Music by Wondershare Filmora 12 

Connect on IG: @saturdayisdadurdaymedia

Transcript

So how's this for an Instagram cliche, saying, If you dwell on your problems, your problems will become your new dwelling. Pretty good, right?
Hello, everyone, welcome into another episode of The Story lesson advice podcast part of Saturday is Saturday immediate life advice, podcast, cooking videos, product reviews, book reviews, all in due time, thank you very much for listening, you can find my YouTube channel and Instagram channel at Saturday is debtor day media, on Instagram and YouTube. Okay, so we'll get right into it. I said, the funny cliche thing here, if you dwell on your problems, your problems will become your new dwelling. And I have a personal story about that. Some of you know I, our family moved to Phoenix about a year and a half ago from the data recording. And when we moved, we knew it was going to be a big leap. And we moved from my wife's career and totally happy for all of that. And when we got here, we have this house in our family lives in at grandma lives with us for the time being. And as we moved on through the year, my wife, you know, really enjoys her job, she's really started to do well there, our daughter loves her school has made a lot of friends, we've made a fair amount of friends. As far as you know, other parents and all of that stuff, my mom settled right in and found a new job real close to home, and a great schedule for her and everything. So everybody's doing well. And even for me, my company was kind enough to let me they kind of created like a hybrid role for me and just said, let's take a year and figure it out. But you know, we want to keep you on as part of the team. So all of that is wonderful. And, for me, I think one of the things I've struggled with for a long time, curious if you have ever felt this way, or when you feel this way how you work through it. But I had a tendency to focus on the negative. And over the last year and a half or so, I think I have become elite at focusing on the negative I not wanting to be an over the top optimist either. But I think I have spent way too much time focusing on negative stuff. And that has just fed into itself. And as I sit here, sort of paying for paying the price for all of my bad choices that were largely driven by my own frustration and my own
unwillingness to look at anything other than the negative, it sort of dawned on me that man, I have spent a lot of time focusing on all the things that I said were quote unquote, wrong with my life and our life and my job and you know, all of that, that I completely have skipped right past all the amazing, wonderful things. And by focusing just on all this negative stuff, some of which is true, and some of which is just sort of made up in my head, that I've just sort of fed that. And I have just, you know, given into my vices and just sitting around and you know, eating like crap, and not exercising consistently and not doing as many productive things as I could and not being focused at work the way I needed to be. I spent so much time over the last year or so, you know, complaining to my wife, or my friends or my co workers, anybody that would listen about how unhappy I was about our living situation or the job I had, or the fact that I didn't know anybody or didn't really have any guy friends or whatever. And there's truth in all of that. And it's okay to recognize all of that. But where I made the mistake, and I'll caution as we get on with this to not have you or others make the mistake is that that's all i That's where I spent my time that was my dwelling. And I just sat and focused on my problems. And that was it. And now I am a year and a half on from living here. And everybody is thriving, be except me. But the reason that I'm not thriving isn't because that the opportunity isn't there, or that the situation isn't there or that I haven't been have everything at my fingertips. The reason I'm not thriving is because I've continued to make one bad choice after the other that has been driven in large part of me being frustrated for some reason or no reason, and choosing to just live there. And that I think is an incredibly, incredibly dangerous thing to do long term. And I can already see the negative ramifications with my health and with my mental health. And, unfortunately, and fortunately, I think there's a valuable lesson to be learned. Oh, all right. And now it's time for this week's sponsor I wish I had and boil boy does this just broadcast to the world send out the bat signal to the world of how old I am getting. This week's sponsor I wish I had is Dr. Scholz. Go Read Laffel pause Doctor shows, plantar fasciitis all day pain relief orthotics, Soul inserts, go ahead and laugh again. Alright, so the reason that I stumbled upon these a couple of years ago was, as the name implies, I had considerable amount of pain with plantar fasciitis or maybe it wasn't that maybe it was just bad stretching and carrying too much weight on me or doing workouts that I wasn't supposed to do or whatever. However, I stumbled upon these after doing some research and Dr. Scholes they make a ton of inserts and you can find them anywhere. And there's different kinds of inserts for athletics or for all day or for women or for men or this or that. The one that I found was the plantar fasciitis all day pain relief, and it really has a good amount of arch support, and it's super comfortable. So what I have done over time is purchased these two put in almost all of my shoes, so they go in my workout shoes and all the shoes that I would wear, you know, just bumming around on a weekend or on a date night am in a couple of semi formal ish pair of shoes I've put them in and they've worked as well. I haven't found a way that they work in like a pair of like straight up dress shoes, but I have replaced virtually all of the insoles of my shoes with with these. And what's convenient about it. The way that you do it is you take your insole out of your current shoe, and you kind of put put them on top of each other like this. And then you just use a pair of scissors at home and you cut around to kind of trim the doctor shoulders when the new one that's going in. And then you put the new one in. And that's it but instantly that can give your shoes new life. It really reduced the amount of pain that I had and my feet and my back and my knees. And I cannot recommend them enough for anybody and especially if you're on your feet all day, or you're working a job where there's a lot of manual labor or if you're doing workouts and maybe you're getting a little older and you want a little extra support. I think these are a fantastic way so I actually have a link to them in the description of the podcast. It is an affiliate link for me through Amazon to be able to purchase these which is where I have purchased them in the past and they are called the DR shoals plantar fasciitis all day pain relief orthotics, however, they also have a whole bunch of different types of insoles for different types of activity for men and women, like I said, so give them a try this week's sponsor, I wish I had Dr. Scholl's plantar fasciitis all day pain relief orthotics. Oh, okay. So I gave you the story that you might have heard before, if you listen to the podcast regularly that our family moved to Phoenix, about a year and a half ago from Texas. And it's been a wonderful transition for all of us, including myself, however, I have chosen to spend much of that time focused on the negative aspects of my life, the quote unquote, negative aspects, which are just things that I don't love as much as I would like to or things I wish were different. But I've chosen to spend too much time focused on negative things. And what that is done the lesson that I have learned, there's a couple lessons. First, the more that I tend to focus on it, the bigger that these manufactured problems in my head become. And a simple example that we can all relate to is, let's say you get in an argument with your spouse or significant other or a co worker or something like that. And you replay it over and over in your head. And if you kind of watch yourself, you can notice that you know your your blood pressure goes up, your heart rate increases, you're just getting kind of just wound up, you're getting all jazzed up. And then when you kind of snap out of it and you you realize that okay, let me stop for a second here, then your body kind of comes back down to earth. So that is really what's been happening to me is I've allowed myself to get really worked up about small and trivial and meaningless things. And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter and 20 years from now, it certainly won't matter. So why am I getting upset now. And I think the reason that I became I'm choosing to focus on being so upset is I think, ultimately, I kind of feel lost. And when some people can maybe feel lost, or they're not really sure what's next in their life, or they're not really sure what's the next step of work or family or relationship or life or whatever. You tend to kind of grab on to whatever you can. And I And for me, what I chose to do was just focus on things that I didn't like, because there was unknown and instead of just sitting with the unknown and just moving forward in life, I've chose to focus on the negative parts of that, or small little inconveniences that are nothing at the end of the day. I've chosen to make a big deal in my head. So that is something that I've come to realize, and maybe from the outside looking in and everybody is like Yeah, no shit, Justin, but for me, it was a realization. So I at least feel good about the fact that I've recognized that. Now the next step is trying to fix it. And something else I didn't realize Until my wife pointed it out was how much of that negativity that I thought I was just kind of keeping to myself or maybe just talking to my wife, about or one of my friends or whatever, in a controlled environment, like, you know, we're having a conversation about it. I didn't realize but just how much of my aura was sort of projecting outward onto everybody else around me, my daughter, my mom, my wife, my friends, my work everything. And even when I wasn't having a conscious conversation about something that I was unhappy with, just I was just projecting unhappiness, and projecting frustration and being upset, and all of that, and I just have turned into not a lot of joy to be around. So that is something else. And boy, what a what a damn shame to do that to my daughter, right? A five year old girl, just innocent, happy as a clam about everything. And she doesn't need me as a rain cloud, in her life for anything. And even though I really focus hard on not trying to get upset with her or yell at her or if I do, I try to talk to her right away about it and apologize and all that, but just, you know, what a damn shame of me to project all that out. So the reason I'm sharing this story and lesson advices even though it's personal, and it might sell sound a little self indulgent, I'm trying to share this so that other people and my daughter one day if she hears this, can maybe catch herself a few minutes earlier than I've caught myself and maybe that can be a difference maker.
Now it's time for this week's just the tip. And this week's just the tip is a cooking tip that as we get into the summer season, and any really anything anytime of the year. But it is my my tip to you is to be very aware of matching your cutting board and your knife size to the the food product that you are going to be cutting on that cutting board and with that knife. So for example, if you have a apple, or you have a small tomato, or you have strawberries, you can use a small cutting board with a small paring knife. That's great. If you have a watermelon, or a cantaloupe or a squash or something like that, you need a big cutting board. And you need a big long knife. And too often myself included, I'm like, Well, I don't want to watch this right, I want to try to put it through the dishwasher or you know, this is too big of a mess, I don't want to deal with it. I just grabbed like, you know, a cutting board the size of a postage stamp, and then a tiny little knife and I tried to cut you know, something way bigger than that. So that is how injuries can happen. And that is how getting very poor cuts in odd shapes, sizes and a poor yield out of the food, you're spending all this money on a watermelon at the grocery store, you need to make sure that you get as much much of it as you can to be able to use that's called yield for food as you get a high yield on that food. So if you have a big watermelon, get a big cutting board, get a big knife for a watermelon, I specifically recommend a serrated bread knife and cut it that way. And you will have plenty of space just like you cannot stuff all the all the watermelon that you could that you cut into a very small Tupperware container, you need a big container. Same thing with that. I know it sounds simple, but always go up a size in whatever you think that you're going to need for a cutting board and a knife. And that will help preserve your fingers. And it will help make sure that you get a better yield out of your product. And a more even set of cuts and all of that sort of stuff. So that is this week's Just The Tip Match the cutting board and the knife appropriately to the food that you're cutting. Oh, alright, so I gave you the story of our family moving here and me choosing to focus on all the negative things, the lessons that I learned. Number one, the more I focused on the negative aspects of the movement of our time here, the larger that became and the more consuming that became. And the other lesson that I learned is I was not aware of how much I was outwardly projecting that negativity and that negative vibe and that negative emotion towards everybody in my orbit. Even when I wasn't directly complaining or directly talking about it, just the fact that I was choosing to exist in a largely negative mindset that that just projected outward. And and you know, something as simple as dropping a slice of apple on the floor, you know, would just would just make me mad. So that is a very valuable lesson to be aware of that and to acknowledge that and the advice that I would give and I wrote this down just so I wouldn't stumble my way through it any more than the rest of this podcast is it's recognize the problem, right? It's okay, if you're upset about something that's what we tell our daughter, Hey, it's okay to be upset. It's okay to feel how you feel. The goal here obviously, is to work through that so that the next time it's a little bit easier to manage and next time and next time next time. But what I've tried to ask myself is, can I fix the problem. So, for example, if I am that unhappy with my job, which I'm not, but it as an example, if I was that unhappy about my job, I could try to fix the problem by applying for new jobs, and maybe changing my career or changing my job, technically, something like that, I do have some amount of control over. So I can choose to fix the problem. And if I can't fix the problem, then the option is to fix my attitude. And that is easier said than done. And where I've chosen to focus, as I said, is I think I'm looking at our move over the last year and a half and saying, you know, I can't fix this, because we're here and we moved. And I'm glad we did, by the way, but, and if there's stuff that I'm unhappy about, and I can't fix it, then I can just fix my attitude about it, I can see it for what it is, I can realize that it might be part of my life for a little bit or a one bit. And I can adjust the way that I manage that emotion or manage that emotionally, and realize that at some point, I have to get rid of the grinding my teeth and wringing my hands, and just move on with the rest of my life. So at the end of the day, if there's a problem that I have the opportunity to fix, then I can fix it to some degree or to all the degrees. And if it's something that I cannot fix that's out of my control, and maybe the way that someone perceives me or something else in the universe that I can't directly control, then all I can do is fix my attitude with it. So that is what I've tried to remind myself and try to give myself that advice. And 15 years from now, 10 years from now, if my daughter is feeling the same way, that is the advice I would want to give to her, say, if you can fix it, then let's think about a wave and try to fix it. And if we can't, then we just have to fix our attitude about it and move forward. That is different than just taking up the old pooper and, you know, turning the other cheek kind of thing. But at some point, you have to realize, Hey, I can't do anything about this, I just got to grin and bear it to some degree and move on and focus on other parts of my life. And, again, I am not given a sob story for myself here because I have a wonderful blessed life. But that is where I've tried to get myself to mentally. So I can rise above all of my negativity and a lot of that, that negative thinking and get to a space where then I can have a better view of my of what's bothering me and why it's bothering me and try to make real progress towards that. But if I can't get to the point where I'm just stopping being angry, then I'm never going to get to that next level where I can actually work through that stuff, and then move forward. Oh.
All right. And now it's time for this week's whisper and, and this week's whispering is an account on YouTube, that I have checked out their videos for several years. And I recently found out that they also have an Instagram account, like, of course they do. But for me, I just kind of put two and two together, but I have been watching their videos for years. And the name of the account is called attractions 360 attractions 360. And their description in the website says just two brothers going on epic adventure. They are theme park enthusiasts, travel enthusiasts hiking, Disney, they are your number one source for attraction videos from around the world in crystal clear, low light 4k video. For those of you who can't make it out to the parks, we want to bring the fun to you. So what I really like about this is we have a young daughter, and we recently went to Disneyland. And beforehand, I was able to watch some of the rides to make sure like the ones where you're supposed to be a little closer or a little taller, to make sure that they weren't too scary or that they were you know, they wouldn't scare too much or freak you out or whatever. And me as well, because bully shed some of those rights. But they're also really fun to just check out right centered around the world if you'd like that kind of stuff, crazy roller coasters or riots in the parks that they don't have here in the US. All that kind of stuff. So I recommend checking them out. They're fun, their videos are really good, and really in depth. And that is the best version of what you will see when you're actually on a ride that I've seen over the last 10 years. So attraction 360 is the account on YouTube and Instagram. Just two brothers going on Epic Adventures. This week's whisper in attractions 360.
All right as we wrap up another week's episode of The Story lesson advice podcast. Thank you so much. If you don't know this is part of Saturday is data remediate. And by the time that this will be released, I will have a series of different series of videos and audio. So we will have I love this podcast on audio podcast and then also clips in the full show on my YouTube channel, I will have a book review podcast that's called I hate reading that has been up and running. And that is a really a video podcast. But there's also an audio version of that as well. And then I have bricks and mortar which is an ongoing cooking series where I focus on using incorporating ingredients that promote things like skin health and heart health and hair health and eye health and sexual health and this health and that health and whatever. And then I also have Unboxing Review and ongoing series on my YouTube channel where i unbox and review products. But the small twist is they are products that I actually use and own. So similar to the sponsor, I wish I had that I share every every episode on this podcast, these are all products that I have and that I've used and things that I recommend to my friends outside of this and I thought oh, that would be a fun way to kind of share that with people if they're looking for something. So all the products that I'm reviewing on Unboxing, Review our products that I own, and believe in. And that's why I'm choosing to do an unboxing review for you. So I will have four different types of content and entertainment going. So thank you. And please check that out at Saturday is Saturday media, on Instagram, and YouTube. Alright, to wrap this up, we talked about the story, we talked about the lessons of me continuing to focus on the negative aspects. And that just sort of increases in balloons and balloons and can become a real problem at some point as it has for him. And the advice that I would give is, it's okay to feel how you're feel acknowledged whatever problems or perceived problems you think you have, and then make the decision, can you fix the problem, and if so, then take steps to fix it. And if you can't fix the problem, then you can fix your attitude. So then take steps to fix your attitude. And those are really the two options that you have at the end of the day. And I understand that some people have real problems and real hardships. And they're dealing with tremendous loss and tremendous grief and struggles with addiction and all that. So I'm not trying to be flippant or make light of any of that kind of stuff. I'm talking about in my experience, and people that I know, if we have the opportunity to fix some of our problems or perceived problems, then let's do it. And if we can't, and let's try to fix our attitude about it and move on. So we can become more positive, less negative, and cast more positive light rather than negative light to those around us and to the world. The sponsor I wish I have as a sign of me aging is Dr. Souls. Dr. Scholl's plantar fascia. Fascia is fasciitis pain relief orthotic insoles, as I said, I've used those for a couple of years now, I've replaced them in almost all my shoes, including my workout shoes, and even my Jordans, and they are really, really comfortable, they provide a lot more support a lot more stability. And I have a tendency to have my my knees kind of move inward towards towards the center of my body. And that kind of creates a problem with my arch. So this kind of helps me stand more upright. The just the tip segment was about right sizing your cutting board and your knife. So if you have a small cutting board and a small knife, those are for strawberries and tomatoes, and pears and oranges. If you have a big cutting board and a big knife that's going to be for stuff like watermelon, and squash and sweet potatoes. And I always say go up one size, what you think for your knife and your cutting board, you want to have a good amount of space to work on. And that's going to help preserve your fingers from a safety aspect. And also make sure that you get the best yield out of the product that you're that you're cutting up. And that you get even cuts as well. And the whispering was attractions 360. They are two brothers that have a YouTube channel and an Instagram account. I've been watching their YouTube videos for years, they take really awesome videos of theme park rides and attractions. And when they go to different locations like Vegas or New Orleans or overseas or they do great hikes or whatever, they they record them and give you a very good point of view aspect of it. And it's a very proper, proper amount of time. So it's not like some you know, quick cut commercial kind of thing. Like you get to actually sit and see it and the camera moves slowly so you really get a sense of kind of what you're getting into. And that was helpful for me as our family went to Disney World a few months ago and I was able to kind of check out ahead of time some of the rides to make sure our daughter wouldn't be too freaked out, or I wouldn't be too freaked out on that. So really, really fun stuff. And it's also cool just to see rides that you might not get a chance to see it, you know, Tokyo Disney or some other theme park that you probably won't ever get to or whatever. So that is it for this week's episode. Thank you very much for listening. We'll be back in two weeks with another episode of The Story lesson advice podcast part of Saturday is Saturday and medium. Thanks